The contradictions of delegated love

Abstract

In this paper, we analyze current, concrete descriptions of love experiences, practices, and repre sentations. At several points, we draw on empirical data collected by Eva Illouz in her research. Since participants' accounts are largely inconsistent and contradictory, we have wondered how it is possible for subjects to materialize their love in the form of practices dictated by market-mediated mass media, and at the same time consider themselves authentic, unique individuals who are not so naïve as to believe in trivialities - in a fiction like love. In this paper, we attempt to develop the logic of such contradictions that are constitutive of the contemporary notion of love, and to find the central mechanism that enables the uninterrupted, repeated performance of love rituals, on the basis of which subjects dispose of their own belief in love, embodied in material practices, and transfer it to the other. We also note that the love relationship today is generally understood within the framework of a liberal psychological discourse on the nature of interpersonal relationships that promotes the idea of so-called „pure relationships“. In this dispositif, the love relationship is said to be primarily about the equal, mutual benefit of intimate partners, with an emphasis on emotional economy and working toward self-actualization. In the course of the historical transformation of the nature of love and other relationships, the individual, love, and social relationships as such have been psychologized and have become a new form of capital.